Yesterday I posted my Top Ten: Best Movies of 2008, so how do I follow that up? With my Top Ten: Worst Movies of 2008. There were many good movies that came out in 2008, but even more terrible movies were released. Sometimes I sit back and wonder how these movie producers can throw their money into these garbage films…it’s simple amazing to me. There were many crappy movies out there, and having to choose only ten was difficult. Before we get to the list, here are a few dis-honorable mentions:

DIS-HONORABLE MENTIONS
10,000 B.C. – Didn’t we just see this movie? The should have named it Apocolypto, B.C.
Rambo – Seeing Stallone reprise this role just reeks of desperation.
Beverly Hills Chihuahua – Seriously?
You Don’t Mess With The Zohan – Adam Sandler was funny in the late 90s and hasn’t been since.

#10. The Love Guru
I feel the same way about Mike Myers as I do Adam Sandler. He’s just not funny anymore. The first two Austin Powers movies were pretty funny, but his overacting has ruined everything since. Just walk away Mike…your done.

#9. Forgetting Sarah Marshall
This movie was god awful! If I ever see Jason Segel’s little smokie again it will be too soon. Seriously, why did we need to see that? The other part of the movie that really bugged me was Kristen Bell (Sarah Marshall) isn’t remotely good looking compared to Mila Kunis. You all know how I feel about her…big crush. After watching this movie it was easy to “Forget Sarah Marshall”.

#8. Semi-Pro
Here’s a believable plot. Let’s make Will Ferrell a basketball player that saves the future of his 1970’s basketball team. Could there be a lamer movie? Well, actually I have seven more to round out the list. The humor in this movie wasn’t even that funny…I didn’t get it. I think Will Ferrell is suffering from the same unoriginal overacting as Myers and Sandler.

#7. Leatherheads
When I saw the trailer for this movie, I thought it would be a riot. Instead it turned out to be a big stinky pile of crap. I tried to find something worth enjoying in the movie, but there wasn’t much. Renee Zellweger was a little bit of eye candy, but not enough to make me like the movie. It was just boring and not remotely entertaining. I thought with John Krasinski and George Clooney we might get some humorous gems, but unfortunately the plot was as muddy as the fields they played football on.

#6. Burn After Reading
How do you make a movie look fantastic and then turn it to crap? Apparently, you put as many big names in it as possible, show all of the funny parts in the trailer and have nothing else to back it up. I love the Coen Brother’s movies, but they’ve gone downhill lately. I think they need to reflect on what made movies like Fargo, The Big Lebowski and O’ Brother Where Art Thou great. This movie was a big letdown, but not the biggest.

#5. HULK
I hate to say it Marvel, but I don’t think there will ever be a way to make a good HULK movie. I was really looking forward to this edition and thought it might be good. Unfortunately, the movie was okay at best, and the climactic final fight scene was too short. I’m hoping that they can work out the kinks with The HULK in the future for the Avengers movie, but it will be tough. Edward Norton did a great job as Bruce Banner, but he couldn’t carry the film on his own.

#4. Hancock
In a botched attempt at coming up with a different take on super hero movies, Hancock ate a big…well, you know what I mean. The movie was going great and then it hit a wall. Finding out that Hancock was some sort of god that is weakened when around Charlize Theron is one thing, but then you find out she’s a god as well and they were together many thousands of years ago is crazy. The movie just took one of those fatal turns and didn’t regain momentum…big disappointment.

#3. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull
This latest rendition of the Indiana Jones series did one thing…it has to be the longest title for a movie ever. Even Fallout Boy is jealous of how long this movie title is. The Crystal Skull had all of the same Indiana Jones effects, but the killer for me was Mutt (Shia LeBouef) swinging through the trees like a monkey. That did it for me, after that I couldn’t take the movie seriously anymore. I think it’s time for Indy to go back to the nursing home and hang up the whip. This series is officially done.

#2. Sex and the City: The Movie
I for one was elated when Sex and the City was finally finished on HBO. Why for the love of God did they have to make a movie? Who cares what happened to them after the series was over? Not me. Could there be four more annoying women in the world? I take that back, there are five…they’re on The View.

#1. Cloverfield
Any movie that has a warning that you may get nauseous while watching it is a big red flag. The camera movements in Cloverfield were awful. God forbid you try to watch it with any lights on either. The entire movie was shot on a handycam and makes The Blair Witch Project look like a cinematic masterpiece. Everyone wanted to see Cloverfield after the mysterious trailers hit the airwaves, but that excitement died soon after it’s release.

That’s all folks! My Top Ten: Worst Movies of 2008. I know that I could have probably picked thirty or fourty, but I do have a full-time job and other responsibilities. What do you think of the list? Which movies would you add? Let me here it.

~ GrandmasterB